Breast Prosthetics ✔️

Since my surgery in February, a part of my body that was not the biggest and best asset, was taken away from me.  My doctor informed me from the beginning that the option of reconstructive surgery would only be considered at the end of all my treatments, therefore in about a years time.  It was not recommended during my mastectomy, disappointing but at that point I didn't care and all I wanted was for the cancer to be out me. Today almost 7 weeks after my surgery, it is still very hard for me to look in the mirror.  It is a feeling that is hard to explain, but something just came into my body and took over and took my breasts from me, it was a big shock and reality check, a part of me that is gone forever. 

As summer is soon approaching and I think and contemplate on how will I dress and what will look good and what will not look good, I made a decision. It may sound shallow but our body is important to us at any size, shape or form whether we want to admit it or not. I will admit that albeit I was not a very chesty girl I did appreciate what I had but always wanted a little more, how ironic that it was completely taken away in the blink of an eye.  Your self esteem, your confidence or lack of and a part of you is gone and honestly I am not sure if you truly get it back, I guess it is still very soon for me, all is very fresh and the wounds are still healing, emotionally as well as physically. 

Today I had an appointment at Studio Equilibra, the post mastectomy lingerie store that I discovered prior to my surgery. The sales lady was very nice and so respectful towards the comfort zone of being topless in front of her, merci Chantal.   I went today to shop for breast prosthetics so that I could feel somewhat womanly again. My husband was right there by my side as I tried on different sizes and shapes (lol) as he tried to support me and help me decide what to choose. I figured since I was not very chesty to begin prior to my surgery, I could be any size I wanted to be.  I will admit that I did go bigger and I am happy with the outcome, should I decide to have the reconstruction done at the end of this unwanted journey, this is the size I want, after all why not, right.  Therefore, $800 later, thank god for insurance and Medicare paying for portions of it, I have a look of femininity again but not the feel.  Some may think that it is vein and that maybe I should be happy the way I am, honestly when it is not your choice and the choice is made for you, it is a lot harder to accept. 

I truly hope that my openness with my journey can help just one other woman.  

All I can say is ladies, do what your heart tells you and what is best for you.